I Am 'Lanzones'
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Lanzones
You need utmost patience to love me. As a seed, I germinate and grow small stalks around two to three weeks. As a seedling, it will take about 10 to 18 months before I can be planted outside. For me to bear fruit, it will take about to 10 to 30 years or more. I thrive under shade, and I need to be well watered at least two years after I am planted. I am harvested in March, April, and October.
As a fruit, I am small and round, measuring around five centimeters in diameter. Because of my yellow skin, I look like a small potato. I am usually in clusters with other two to thirty fruits. When you peel me, I have semi-translucent white segments, which occasionally have dark, bitter, and not-fit-to-eat seeds. After peeling me, I can make your fingers sticky.
My flesh is soft, light and juicy. My taste is acquired, meaning I do not expect you to love me the first time. But rest assured that after tasting me the second time, I grow on you and you will fervidly fall in love with me. Many people have compared my taste to grapes and grapefruit, which I do not appreciate. I have my own identity, and people have to accept that I am incomparable and my taste is one of a kind.
I carry 57 calories per 100 grams of my edible portion. I have oodles of health benefits. I am rich in fiber, antioxidant, niacin, riboflavin, and vitamin A, among others … I have medicinal and practical uses. When my peel is dried and burned, for example, it can be used to remove odor and as a mosquito repellant.
Are you not impressed yet? Here are some more … I am revered in Paete, Laguna, Philippines, because of my extra sweetness. I am the town’s biggest pride. I have a festival in my honor every September. Now, you can say I am a party animal because there are days of awe-inspiring celebrations because of me.
I have the bragging rights to be the only Philippine fruit to have starred in a film—yes, a film! It is very hard to believe, but truth is stranger than fiction. Biyaya ng Lupa (Blessings of the Land) was produced by LVN Pictures in 1959. Directed by Manuel Silos, it starred Tony Santos Sr. and Rosa Rosal. Leroy Salvador won best supporting actor at the Asian Film Festival. The film was nominated for best film at the Berlin International Film Festival. It won the best picture and best original story (Celso Al. Carunungan) at the Filipino Academy of Movie Arts and Sciences (FAMAS). By now, you must be wondering what was my role in the film. I am really low profile. As much as possible, I do not want to be the center of attention. But film judges would have given me an award had I been assertive. The epic melodrama has ingredients of a blockbuster: murder, rape, and revenge. You might not have paid attention, but I am there the whole time, from the time I am planted until the first time I am harvested. The setting is in an orchard of me! Do you get it? Me, me, me—a humble lanzones. When my harvest is threatened in the film—hold your breath!—I become the climax! The entire village prevents the antagonists from destroying me. I am pretty sure many people paid to see me. I was a megastar long before the word was coined!
Biyaya ng Lupa (Blessings of the Land)
My influence in the arts is far reaching. Grapes, which I do not care for because of senseless comparisons with my taste, are usually featured in still-life paintings. But in Joni Ramos’s Kantele and Bandurria (2020), I made history—a bunch of me is standing next to grapes. Yellow rules in the painting. My pale yellow serves contrast to the bright yellow of the bandurria. After this, I predict that other still-life artists will follow suit and feature me. Move over grapes! One of these days, you will be relegated, and I will be the sole star!
Kantele and Bandurria by Joni Ramos, 2020, acrylic on canvas, 20” x 15”. (Finnish American Heritage Center)
I am what I am! I am delectable, therefore I am! Lanzones is a lanzones is a lanzones is a lanzones. The more you see or taste me, the more you will crave for me! Enjoy!
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Nina Ines Garma is a food business-management graduate of The Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park, New York. A native Californian, she is a proud “ate” to twins, Camilo and Regan. She enjoys running her humorous Hello Kitty Facebook group: Sanrio Hell.
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